by Angela Smith | Jul 15, 2015 | Writing
It’s time for the annual RWA conference, which has changed many people’s lives, positively and negatively. Here I would like to offer tips to first-timers and long-timers alike to make this the most successful conference ever!
For the First-Timers:
The conference can be intimidating. Who am I kidding? It is intimidating. No matter how well prepped you feel you are, once you get there you probably won’t feel near as prepped and will want to run screaming and hiding in your room. That’s okay. If you are introverted, you should definitely take time for yourself. Even if you aren’t an introvert, you should take time for yourself.
So the first tip?
Take time for yourself.
Not just in the morning or evening. Sometimes during the day, when there’s a workshop you really want to attend but you can’t possibly, you just have to take a break. I made the mistake of trying to cram in all the workshops and then not getting near as much out of it as I could have, then I got way too tired and wanted to run home as fast as I could. Luckily I got some rest and reenergized myself.
Don’t keep your head down.
This is not the time to keep your head down. Make eye contact and smile. Be approachable, and approach others. If you are introverted and have to give yourself a pep talk, by all means do so.
Avoid sensory overload.
Beginners are told not to sleep in, don’t sight-see, and take every workshop you can. I disagree. There is such a thing as sensory overload, at least for me, where all that information turns into negative information. Audio recordings are a good investment for those times you must take a break. True, the actual experience can be better, but not always when you are already on sensory overload. Also, we are writers. Sight-seeing is the best possible thing we can do for our creativity, not sitting in a workshop. Personally, I think audio should be a gift to all RWA attendees.
Volunteer.
The second conference I attended, I volunteered, and it was the best experience of my life even if I had no idea what I was doing. I was afraid and almost talked myself out of skipping out on it, but a sense of self-perseveration guided me to finish what I had promised. I made a contact with a special friend and we still remain in contact.
We aren’t all the same, but that doesn’t matter.
Another piece of advice given to first-timers is that we are all the same. If we were all the same, well then none of this would matter, now would it? Take those experiences you gain from others to help strengthen yourself. Be a good listener, and a good learner, but remember to sift through the advice you are given. Not all of it is good, but some of it can be life-changing.
Don’t be afraid to ask.
I met a lot of fabulous people, some who might not ever remember me but authors who I hold a small crush for. Authors like Nora Roberts, Erica Spindler, Karen Rose, and Eloisa James. They changed my life without even knowing, and it’s not because I’m a crazy stalker fan girl. It’s because I was not afraid to approach them and ask for a picture. Eloisa James even said it’s the 21st century, you should never be afraid of asking for a picture!
Don’t miss out on opportunities.
I lost a lot of opportunities because I didn’t follow through, didn’t want to interrupt, or didn’t know how to forward the conversation. I also lost out a lot because I was too tired, or because someone might have offered a compliment (I love your shirt!) and I only said thank you without creating more conversation because they were involved in a group of people I didn’t want to interrupt. Well, if they said something to me, then I wasn’t interrupting them. Lots of other missed opportunities that I won’t bother mentioning but just remember not to miss out on your opportunities. No matter how intimidated or tired you might feel, remember why you are there, and make the most of it. Hiding in your hotel will not make the most of it, but don’t forget to rest.
Don’t overschedule yourself.
You don’t have to go to every workshop. Buy the recording or talk to someone who went to the workshop you wanted. Don’t be afraid to leave if a workshop isn’t giving you what you want. Also, remember that pitching can offer you opportunities to meet others, just don’t bother someone who is deep in their thoughts while getting ready to pitch. Remember to always offer encouragement.
Remember this conference won’t make or break you.
You no longer need an agent or editor to survive. There are a lot of freelance editors you can use to grow your career. If you get bad feedback from an agent or editor, remember they are just people, too. Maybe they’re having a bad day or maybe they just aren’t worth your time. Use constructive feedback to grow, but learn to toss negative or hurtful feedback. If that means you have to run and hide for a while, so be it, but keep your head up and don’t let it affect you for long!
Don’t let a negative experience talk you out of moving forward.
Okay, so I have a confession to make. When I went to D.C. in 2009, I was so excited and energized to go to my first RWA conference, something I had been dreaming of since forever! When I came away from that conference, I felt like a loser for not feeling near as energized and motivated as people convinced me I should be. Once I got home, I remembered some positive experiences, but I didn’t write or publish again for almost five years! I’m not blaming it on the conference, but I do feel like it greatly benefited the reasons I almost threw up my hands.
And for that reason, I am offering a few tips for long-timers.
For the Long-Timers:
Remember the first-timers.
First timers are told to network, speak up, learn and grow, blah blah blah. They’ll often go to bars, sit by themselves, order take-out for their room and run and hide, feeling like an outcast. It can feel like a high school full of cliques. The long-timers forget that a newbie might not want to approach a group of people because they don’t want to be rude and interrupt, or they don’t want to approach one person who has their head down in their phone or in a notebook or in the pages of a book. You might have your group you feel comfortable with, but remember we are all creative people, and sometimes going outside your clique, your comfort zone, could change your life. You never know what kind of newbie you might meet.
Remember the first-timers’ discomfort.
If a newbie doesn’t offer engaging conversation or respond the way you would like, maybe their mind is reeling with everything they’ve learned and everything going on. Maybe they are on sensory overload. Don’t take it personally or consider them a lost a cause. Continue to engage and offer inspiration, or recognize that they are too tired and it’s time for them to leave. Exchange contact information, and contact them!
We probably do want to talk to you.
If we have our head down and look engaged, we probably do want to talk to you. We are all here for the experience, and that experience is found in networking with others. Remember, a newbie feels much more intimidated than someone who has gone through this every year. You can be a good motivation.
Offer positive feedback.
Always be welcoming and encouraging. We aren’t in high school anymore.
Approach, and be approachable.
At RWA Nationals, there are a lot of private meetings going on in public locations. Newbies generally don’t feel comfortable approaching people who are engaged. If you have a meeting and are really talking to someone, then continue on. If you see someone alone, even if they are involved with their phone or with their head down, introduce yourself. But no matter how involved you are in anything, be approachable. You never know when the next experience—even one with a newbie—will change your life. We are writers, after all. Our experiences matter.
This is not a sales pitch.
We aren’t here to sell ourselves. We are here to network. If you find yourself only talking about yourself, maybe it’s time to step back and reevaluate the conversation. A lot of people talk about themselves because they are afraid of silence, but enjoy the momentary silence. Chances are, it won’t last long.
Does it really matter how we are enjoying our conference?
If you really wanted my opinion and I was honest about it, I’d tell you something different each time you asked, depending on how I’m feeling at the time. At one time, I hate it and want to run home. Another time, I’m loving it and never want the experience to end. Only once I’m home and able to process everything do I realize how much I enjoy it. If you use that line as an opener for someone just because you have nothing else to say, remember that might not be the best way and surely there’s something else you can ask. How many newbies ask you how you are enjoying your conference? Most of us don’t want to be honest. We love it later, once we process it all, but during the moment we might be extremely uncomfortable and don’t want to admit it, and you could be losing out on a potentially great conversation with going with the same old question.
Remember we aren’t all extroverts, but we all want to gain something from this experience. That means going outside our comfort zones.
by Angela Smith | Feb 18, 2014 | Writing
A while back I posted about semicolons and how much I dislike them. Ever since, it seems they’ve been taunting me as they pop up in people’s posts, even my own, and overused in books. I thought I might try to learn to appreciate them, albeit reluctantly, but it’s still a work-in-progress.
I’ve never really cared for the suckers, but imagine my surprise when I was reading Spunk & Bite and came upon the chapter titled The Art of the Semicolon. Again, I say, they are taunting me.
I had been reading the book for a while but when I came upon this chapter, I set aside the book for months. I didn’t care about the mark and knew I couldn’t get into this article. And maybe I wouldn’t have appreciated it at the time I set the book down, which is why I picked it back up now.
I had forgotten about the book, saw it one day (in the bathroom), and picked it up to open it at the bookmark. And, because semicolons had been on my mind a lot lately, I decided to see what this author had to say.
I’ll start off my saying that I’ve never liked semicolons. Anyone who knows me well knows that. So when an editor blasted my book with semicolons, I cringed and went on something of a … well, panic attack. If you ask the author of Spunk and Bite, he might tell you that some would say it’s because I don’t understand them. “I exist, ergo, figure me out” he says of semicolons.
But I do; I do understand them; I just don’t like them.
This chapter gave me a new appreciation of this dreaded punctuation mark. He talked of its history and spoke of long-ago authors. Dickens loved them and Twain made ample use of them. Then he spoke of how some authors overuse them. Yes, thank you thank you, I agree with that. After all before I (somewhat) learned to appreciate them, one was too much in my book.
Arthur Plotnik of Spunk and Bite calls the semicolon an art. Although I wouldn’t name it as art, I couldn’t have said his words better myself. Yes, the semicolon has grammatical rules, but they are often overlooked nowadays. I know some who would say only fools overlook them, but to each his own. I believe, as this author believes, that the semicolon should be used as “certain nuances felt by the writer, certain gestures and whispered messages.”
“With the semicolon, there is a split second tease,” Arthur Plotnik says.
I love how Arthur Plotnik describes them as this: “How do I want to orchestrate the sense and cadence of my writing?”
To me, semicolons aren’t about being grammatically correct. They are about constructing your words, your sentence, your story, just as this author describes. And, like anything, they can be overused.
You can use semicolons to orchestrate your writing. Use can use them to act as mortar, a separator, expression, or clarity. In my opinion, of course, you wouldn’t want to overuse them, even to separate two separate sentences where a period could be used, unless the novel calls for it. It’s not about the sentence or the grammar, but about the novel as a whole.
And I say of a semicolon: to thine own self; be true.
by Angela Smith | Jan 28, 2014 | Introspective, Relationships, Writing
?
Sex. It’s a part of love or at least it should be, in my opinion. So why is it so hard to write about?
My biggest concern when writing sex scenes is my thoughts on who is going to read it. I know it’s crazy, but once I do get out of my character’s head and back to reality, I think about my aunts, uncles, cousins, sister, and friends who will read what I wrote. To me, it’s my character’s POV but I know in reality, my family will realize I wrote that because they don’t understand how it to be inside a character’s head. Hopefully, they’ll be in the POV and won’t even think about me writing this, LOL. But it’s still a thought, a dread, a fear of writing that particular scene that keeps me doubting on how to (or even if I should) write it.
Sex, even creative sex, is a magical part of a relationship, which is why I like to include it in my stories. Some books have a lot of sex, some books have a little sex, and some are spicier than others. Most of the time, we don’t talk about it with others. But when you’re writing about it, it feels like others are going to think these terrible thoughts about what kind of person you must be. Writers, am I right?
In talking with several writers, I realize there are many different approaches to writing a sex scene, and many different opinions regarding the writing and reading of sex scenes. One writer even said she didn’t think they were as necessary today, and the popularity of sex scenes was fading.
I disagree. Personally, I like them when they aren’t long, arduous, or graphic. I like a little shock, but I prefer to read about the emotive part of the sexual experience. With the build-up of tension between two characters that are falling in love, closing the door on a sex scene doesn’t feel right to me. Of course, there are some novels where a sex scene wouldn’t move the story forward, and that’s perfectly okay.
I have written some sweet stories with absolutely no sex (none yet completed or published at this time but maybe hopefully in the future). However, my romantic suspense stories always have some sex scenes as long as it moves the story (and the relationship) forward. There’s no point in having a sex scene just to have a sex scene.
Also, I believe writers are afraid of writing sex scenes. Partly because of what I just admitted to you about family, and partly because they have no idea where to start. That’s when, as a writer, you have to get out of your head and get into your character’s head. Don’t overthink it. And remember, there’s always a rewrite and plenty more rewrites.
What about you? How do you feel about sex scenes in a romance novel?
by Angela Smith | Jan 24, 2014 | Writing
A writer’s worst nightmare: to be or not to be grammatically correct.
Yeah, those little green squiggly lines in Microsoft Word can be annoying. But how many bestselling books have you ever read are grammatically correct? Sometimes being the smartest person in the room is an annoyance to the average reader.
Will it make me look stupid if I’m not grammatically correct?
In my opinion, sometimes it’s worse, on the page, to be grammatically correct. Yet there are so many people, especially nowadays because they’re afraid grammar is falling by the wayside, who become the “grammar police” and fix every single grammatically wrong sentence structure in a story that it doesn’t even feel like a story anymore.
Now, is the above sentence grammatically correct?
A normal person doesn’t think, read, or write grammatically correct. Whether they should or shouldn’t is beyond the point. If we follow all the grammar rules, there are many things writers shouldn’t do. Obviously, there are rules that will MAKE US LOOK STUPID if we don’t follow them, but following certain rules make us appear stuffy.
For instance, commas vs. semicolons.
I cringe when I see a semicolon, even when I know it’s correct. When I’m in a person’s head, their POV, that person is going to think in clipped sentences and sometimes way too long in the eye of an erudite. Characters don’t think in terms of semicolons or what is right and wrong in grammar. Characters have their own way of speaking, of thinking, and a good author will follow that way despite what the grammar police say. Look at the bestselling authors of this century, even the last century. Semicolons are rarely, if ever, used.
I once had an editor who corrected my sentences to semicolons on almost every single page. I had to ignore them. Sometimes, I changed them, depending on the sentence or the way it was said. Sometimes it challenged me to think of a different way of saying the sentences altogether. And I finally had to write a “letter to the editor” and let them know why I chose to ignore the changes.
I read a lot. And I read a lot of bestsellers. Most authors are bestsellers for a reason, whether you like them or agree with the fad or not. So my suggestion to would-be authors is to read those best sellers, figure out what it is that makes them work, and don’t always listen to the rules! Sometimes that means disagreeing with your editor! After all, a good editor will know the grammar rules, and will try to follow them despite how you feel it makes or disrupts the story! But a good author will know when it’s time to ignore those rules.
That being said, I have to say that authors who chose to be grammatically correct, if you’re doing well, then by all means you should keep doing what you are doing! Maybe times are changing, but I haven’t seen it and I refuse to follow in those footsteps. The grammar rules of yesteryear don’t always apply to the way we read today, and neither does it mean we are stupid or disrespectful for not following them. And if I’m going to lose a reader because they don’t like my grammar, then I’ll probably gain five more because they weren’t annoyed with my grammar. And yes, I have been annoyed by reading too many semicolons. I would rather read the wrong word than too many semicolons.
If in doubt, do what the bestsellers do. Not what the grammar police tell you to do.
by Angela Smith | Sep 8, 2013 | Writing
I’m not what you call an athlete. The most extreme activity I would take on is exercise, Jeeping through the mountains, or riding my bike on flat, level ground.
But I love to write about extreme sports and many of my characters partake in some type of sport. Garret and his brother Chayton in Burn on the Western Slope love to ski, ice climb, and many other mountain adventures. Jake, in my current work-in-progress, is a triathlete. I’ve also written about an auto racer and a surfer (look for those soon!). Most of my characters participate in some type of sport, whether it’s a hobby or a career.
I also love to watch extreme sports, and learning more about those activities was one of my favorite parts of writing Burn on the Western Slope. The research was fun and I almost felt like I was involved in the ice climbing with Garret and his brother. (That particular scene had been deleted before publication of the book, but it still taught me a great many things useful for other scenes and character development).
In my research, I learned that airdog means a snowboarded most interested in aerial tricks and thus, Air Dog became the name of the bar that Garret’s brother owns in Burn on the Western Slope. (Watch for Chayton’s story coming soon!)
Without further ado, I wanted to introduce you to my new paper at paper.li. XtremiA about extreme sporting in the US and beyond. It’s a great way to learn about or keep updated on extreme sports, and I continue to use it for research on my books. If you have any suggestions for news sources, I’d love to hear about it!
http://paper.li/angelaswriter/1378648902
by Angela Smith | Sep 1, 2013 | Writing
The moose is my writer’s symbol, and here’s why.
A few years ago, with the advent of new eBook and print on demand publishers, I published 2 novels within months of each other, fulfilling my dream of publication. But fame did not prevail, and the stress of publicity along with self-promotion was more than I could bear. I overextended myself mentally, physically and financially as I worked full time, started a new business with my husband, and continued pursuit of my dream.
An emotionally draining job left little energy to continue writing when it seemed my writing career wasn’t going to take off. Plus, I felt I had to keep it secret from my boss and thus separate from my life. This made it hard to keep it a part of my life at all. I was discouraged with my publisher and the publishing world in general (especially eBooks—I wanted to break out commercially). I thought about giving up many times. I prayed and ranted to God, wondering why He would put this dream in my heart if I was never going to be successful. Mere publication wasn’t, IMO, success. I wanted more.
I finished my third novel, yet couldn’t get it published, even though I stopped trying as hard. I once envisioned this wonderful book signing event where I would feature a moose, which was a huge symbol in my book, and I told myself if I ever published this story, I would have to find me a stuffed moose. I already had the image of him in my head and how I would take him along with me on my book signings. This stuffed moose was almost like a character in my book. I imagined him many times.
After a year of having my third story written and about 40 rejections later, and many months of an on again, off again relationship with writing, I was ready to give up, or at least “give myself a break without beating myself up”. I cancelled my website (I was having problems with the webhost anyway) and I thought about doing away with everything related to my writing.
One day during my lunch break, I went to a gift shop with a (non-writing) friend of mine and there, sitting on the shelf, was the moose—almost exactly as I had pictured him in my story and in my dreams. Just one moose, for sale, amongst many other items. One moose in a gift shop in a Texas town that barely experiences winter, much less moose. Deer are prevalent, but not moose. I didn’t buy him, but kept looking and thinking about him. I told my husband about him because it was so close to Christmas I thought if my husband bought him, fine, but if not, then it wasn’t meant to be.
The next morning, I was reading my “writer’s devotional” (Julia Cameron’s Finding Water). It was the very last chapter and, I thought, my last hurrah with writing for a while. If I decided to take it up again, fine, but it wouldn’t be that important to me. I had way too many other things to worry about and I was just one person. Whether or not I published another book was obviously not going to make an impact on anyone else, so why should I let it impact me?
No matter what, it would always impact me. Writing is my passion, and nothing could change that. In this devotional, Julia spoke of a writer’s symbol. She explained why it was so important to have a symbol that means something to you and your writing (whether it’s a bracelet, necklace, etc). I knew then that I had to go back and get that moose. It was my symbol, calling out to me. I knew it when I saw it, yet I kept trying to ignore it and push it out of my mind. When I went back to the store, the owner’s little girl said, “Finally someone is buying that moose. He has been staring at me all this time.” This was affirmation that this moose was my sign.
If I hadn’t read that chapter the very next day, I might have ignored the moose (though I hadn’t been able to get it out of my mind since I saw it the day before). Reading that chapter was like I had been sucker-punched. If I ignored that message, then I had no one to blame but myself.
I’ve learned a lot of things along the way during my writer adventure. I write for myself now, even though sharing it with others makes a writer feel like they’ve accomplished something. I don’t want fame, and the publishing world is ever changing. Publication does equal success, because I am following my dream. I will never hide who I truly am or let anyone take that part of me away. My moose sits along beside me as I continue to write. He is my writer’s symbol, a reminder that I am heading down the right path no matter how difficult the journey.
The moose Reagan finds in Burn on the Western Slope is also a symbol, and she finds something else special about him, later. Here’s an excerpt of Reagan with her cousin, Naomi, when she first finds the the moose:
She stopped at the French doors and shifted the heavy drapes to look outside, but the darkness only revealed her reflection. Moving aside, she rubbed her nose against the moose’s furry forehead.
“What are you doing?” Naomi asked as she entered the room, startling Reagan.
Reagan kept her back to Naomi. “Meeting Dr. Till.”
“Doctor who?”
“Dr. Till,” Reagan replied as she held up the moose. The name had just come to her, and it sounded right. Naomi would think she was crazy, but he felt like a sign to her. He represented the physical metaphor of her insecurities. “He was sitting here atop the bed, all propped up as if waiting for me,” she explained. “He’s my doctor until I get my head back on straight.”
“Reagan darling, no stuffed animal will help you get your head on straight.”
“I beg to differ. He’s a sign.”
“A sign of what?”
“That I’m doing the right thing.”
“Of course you’re doing the right thing. Was there ever any doubt?”
